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A Sosmed-ing be focused they say…

Have a clear understanding about why we medsos-ing do you use it for:
– just having fun?
– romantic / looking for partner?
– share experience? ? AKA nyombong
– money?
Whatever it is be clear about it… easier said than done… after so many years having twitter… I think I can say I dont have a clear purpose… I just go with the flow…

Jakarta di Starbuck yang harga americanonya 32rb… Sic

Ahok sungguh tidak manusiawi

Tanggapan saya terhadap tulisan @awemany disini : https://ardiwirdamulia.com/2016/10/05/bagi-ahok-anda-dan-saya-cuma-barang-pameran-mati-kita/

I burned the bridge and amended

Few weeks back I am in the situation where I have to make a tough choice… One particular client has not signed the agreement, for two months..! We never had a problem before and the relationship is fantastic. My contat person is a woman… head of her division… I can describe her as the “coach” in that company, basically she inform me of the situation ahead of time, so I can prepare the things correctly, both information and politically.

When a client has been in two months receiving service without agreement, let alone payment, warned it many times that I can not continue providing the service to her team when we have not receive the agreement at certain date.

Certainly  the deadline is passed… I hold all the services… fair enough right… :). but my contact badly need me presenting to their bosses… and I told her, I bend my back to give them 2 months of service without agreement… so no dice… agreement first I said…

She is very surprise, little that I know she actually do not understand that we have certain deadline… the team has not properly communicated to her. Well, when she hear me saying that… she snapped and throw her phone… I can hear the sound of the phone hitting the desk :)

So there you go.. she will not respond to my email, phone or anything anymore, the bridge has burned. Flaming like the golden sun during the sunset, Beautiful… NOT. My boss almost has an heart attack knowing the situation (this client is one of the biggest revenue)… I said dont worry… I will solve it…

Later on I expressed my dissappointment with her team. So they speed up the process of signing the agreement, I also help them provide Top of The Line information… she still not responded my goodwill gesture, no thank you, no nothing… you know… woman… :)

So I have to find a way to meet her… she will not respond to any meeting invitation… so I aks  her team where can I meet her in person.. they told me that she usually go to a cafe after office hour,  I went there and meet her in person… at first, she is very surprised but she can not do anything because I already in front of her and said “Hi”with happy face, and the shake her hand and said. How are you… and you know what she said..?

“I still mad at you” she said… Yea I know… I respond… but I have limitation too you know… you will do the same if you were me. And she blurted  many many many words to express how dissapointed she is how she feel betrayed after all these years helping me… I patienly listening, you know… woman,  :).  cut the story short… we agreed on what we have to do when there is a very important deadline and there, we amended the bridge… no romance sorry… :)

Jkt 29th April

Will you help..?

I was born and raised in village, where everybody are helping each other… even you work together with total stranger to help someone else that you may also never met before… we call it Gotong-Royong… a helping spirit among us… it is still today, so if you’re in a village, try asking for help, and they will take it seriously and everyone will be happy to help you.

I bring that attitude when I was in university …  when I saw small accident in the road, I will stop and help as much as I can, and leave after I make sure that the person is alright… I will not hesitant to help colleagues and friends who need money more than me…  but that somehow is no longer true… or I should say not in the extent that I will do as in the some previous year. What has happened..?

Jakarta change me.. :). It goes back when I moved to Jakarta after graduating… I have few close friends,  one day one of my friend who works in the same company with me said : he needs help. Her mother has cancer and need to go to hospital and wants to borrow some money, he will pay in monthly installment from his salary… I agreed and lend him my savings, quite a significant amount to me…

Very strange happening afterward, he don’t want to talk with me, keeping distance and seems avoiding me as much as possible… may be because he focus on his mother… Monthly installment never came (no interest rate BTW), may be he use it for his mother… after 6 months the installment never came. But I need the money, so I remind him about the deal… he just smile and say “yes later”… But later I found out that his mom is OK, no cancer, no hospital just happy-as-you-can-be mom… When I confront him later… he just smile and said the money spent to something else, but will pay it… it never happen, he finally leaves the office and work somewhere else…

I had another few similar incidence, and then I found how different Jakarta with a small village where I were born… so I no longer  trust someone who say “I need help, can I borrow money”. I always change the word “can I borrow some money” into “can you give me money”, hence if possible, I will give money without expecting that I will get it back later… but it will be much much less that he or she originally wants… and as much as I prepared to lose the money. I lost  few friends because they simply avoiding me after receiving the money… it does not bother me at all,

But the level now is getting higher… the crooks now using our helping attitude to try to mug us… here is one of the example:

jaysubiakto

The above is a tweet from a famous branding / ad agency in Indonesia : Mr  Subiakto, it said: “if someone lying on the ground after 23.00 in the roundabout of CITOS do not help, their friends are waiting (ready to mug you) under the bridge…”

What if someone had a real accident and need real help at the odd hours… will you help..?  May be by calling police but I do not think we will dare enough to stop and personally help them…  That is really sad, we have lost or reduced our trust and willingness to help because of these people…

Jakarta 3/3/2014 after not so intense meeting…

Borobudur Harta Indonesia Tak ternilai…

This is part four of my visit to Jogjakarta, you can read my previous post : Gudek Yu Jum, Jogjakarta in the night and Gong Xi Fa Cai from Jogja.

Kalau ingin melihat borobudur yang sedang cantik-cantiknya, datanglah pada saat matahari terbit atau pada saat matahari terbenam, itulah yang terlintas pada pikiran ketika di Jogja, panitia mengijinkan saya berangkat duluan karena memang acaranya kesana… akhirnya jam 4 pagi saya pergi dengan menyewa mobil Rp. 400 rb sudah dengan uang bensin…

Sampai di borobudur sekitar jam 5, dan sayapun akan masuk kedalam tapi seseorang berkata, kalau masuk kompleks borobuddur sebelum jam 7,  harus bayar sekitar 300rb… tapi kalau jam 7 keatas bayarnya cuma 30rb…? Whaa… rupanya ada yang mengkomersialkan matahari pagi.. :)

Tapi orang tersebut menawarkan untuk ke bukit Punthuk Setumbu, dari sana bisa melihat Borobudur dari jauh ketika matahari terbit… katanya, dan cuma 100rb… akhirnya saya memilih ke punthuk setumbu… dan inilah foto fotonya… perlu di ketahui saya mengambil gambar pakai lensa 35mm equivalent, jadi ini heavy cropping.

Matahari tertutup awan...

Matahari tertutup awan…

matahari muncul sudah tinggi diatas

matahari muncul sudah tinggi diatas

Not a good wheather untuk melihat sunrise, akhirnya jam 6.30 saya turun dari bukit dan masuk ke kompleks Borobudur untuk melihat dari dekat…

Borobudur ternyata juga berfungsi sebagai jam matahari... ini adalah pintu timur, dan mata hari terbit dapat dilihat dari sisi ini

Borobudur ternyata juga berfungsi sebagai jam matahari… ini adalah pintu timur, dan mata hari terbit dapat dilihat dari sisi ini

Beginilah pintu timur dilihat dari atas, Lurus dati pintu ini adalah Candi mendut dan candi pawon

Beginilah pintu timur dilihat dari atas, Lurus dati pintu ini adalah Candi mendut dan candi pawon, Bila matahari mulai terbit di sebelah kanan, maka itu adalah waktunya petani menanam padi  (foto pakai camera BB)

Relief di candi Borobudur sangat cantik dan jelas, berikut ini menggambarkan orang yang sedang menggosip... diatas ada tulisan "wikromo" artinya perbuatan jelek

Relief di candi Borobudur sangat cantik dan jelas, berikut ini menggambarkan orang yang sedang menggosip… diatas ada tulisan “wikromo” artinya perbuatan jelek  atau tidak bertata krama (wi = tidak)

Ini adalah kapal yang dipakai pada jaman saat itu untuk berdagang kayu manis... telah dibuat replikanya dan sanggup mengarungi lautan... Lihat Paling atas, ada orang sedang menekuk tiang kapal... sebenarnys itu agak tiang tidak lewat dari bingkainya.. :)

Ini adalah kapal yang dipakai pada jaman saat itu untuk berdagang kayu manis… telah dibuat replikanya dan sanggup mengarungi lautan… Lihat Paling atas, ada orang sedang menekuk tiang kapal… sebenarnys itu agar tiang tidak lewat dari bingkainya.. :)

Diorama ini berwarna Kuning karena pada jaman belanda, untuk kepentingan foto dan pemugaran, mereka mewarnainya supaya lebih mudah di foto... ternyata pewarnaan ini membuat diorama rusak dan akan terus rusak sampai catnya habis... tak ada yang bisa dilakukan untuk menghentikan ini

Diorama ini berwarna Kuning karena pada jaman belanda, untuk kepentingan foto dan pemugaran, mereka mewarnainya supaya lebih mudah di foto… ternyata pewarnaan ini membuat diorama rusak dan akan terus rusak sampai catnya habis… tak ada yang bisa dilakukan untuk menghentikan proses kerusakan ini

Gargoyle ini berfungsi untuk talang air yang sudah tidak difungsikan lagi... teknologi yang lebih baru digunakan untuk mengatasi kerusakan dari air hujan

Gargoyle ini berfungsi untuk talang air yang sudah tidak difungsikan lagi… teknologi yang lebih baru digunakan untuk mengatasi kerusakan dari air hujan

Area ini lebih lebar, manusia yang bisa mencapai tingkat ini sudah dikatakan baik... tetapi masih memiliki sifat keduniawian yang di gambarkan ada sudut dan tembok di samping kiri... Satu step lagi, maka orang tersebut akan naik ke tingkat yang tidak lagi memikirkan duniawi, di lambangkan dengan tepian tanpa pagar dan bulat...

Area ini lebih lebar, manusia yang bisa mencapai tingkat ini sudah dikatakan baik… tetapi masih memiliki sifat keduniawian yang di gambarkan ada sudut dan tembok di samping kiri… Satu step lagi, maka orang tersebut akan naik ke tingkat yang tidak lagi memikirkan duniawi, di lambangkan dengan tepian tanpa pagar dan bulat…

Di lantai inilah cahaya budha bersemayam dalam hati orang yang bisa mencapai tingkat ini... Budha ini ada bercak putih karena terkena tetesan semen waktu Belanda merestorasi Borobudur

Di lantai inilah cahaya budha bersemayam dalam hati orang yang bisa mencapai tingkat ini… Budha ini ada bercak putih karena terkena tetesan semen waktu Belanda merestorasi Borobudur

Tingkat tertinggi, puncak kesempurnaan sebagai warga yang beragama Budha

Tingkat tertinggi, puncak kesempurnaan sebagai warga yang beragama Budha

Borobudur pernah di bom oleh orang yang tidak bertanggung jawab... dan direstorasi... anda bisa melihat stupa yang di bomb dengan tanda bintang seperti ini...

Borobudur pernah di bom oleh orang yang tidak bertanggung jawab… dan direstorasi… anda bisa melihat stupa yang di bomb dengan tanda bintang seperti ini…

Betapa kita tidak bisa menghargai karya seni nenek moyang kita... dua orang ini adalah petugas, den mereka dengan enaknya menduduki patung singa, anda bisa melihat bahwa patung singa tersebut susah payah di restorasi... lihat bagian yang ada beda warna.. itu adalah semen yang merekatkan bagian bagian singa tersebut...

Betapa kita tidak bisa menghargai karya seni nenek moyang kita… dua orang ini adalah petugas, den mereka dengan enaknya menduduki patung singa, anda bisa melihat bahwa patung singa tersebut susah payah di restorasi… lihat bagian yang ada beda warna.. itu adalah semen yang merekatkan bagian bagian singa tersebut…

Ada pertanyaan saya yang belum terjawab… orang yang menjadi arsitek borobudur ini begitu hebatnya… seharusnya Indonesia sudah bisa jago dibidang arsitektur… kemanakah orang orang tersebut… kenapa yang tinggal kog sepertinya pada kurang cerdas.. :)

Demikian perjalanan saya ke jogja dalam 2 hari satu malam… sehari setelahnya Gunung Kelud meletus dan abunya sampai ke kota Jogja, dan Borobudur ditutup… literally…

Jakarta at the office, after office hour – waiting for better traffic

My Morality…

Hasil tes moral… Fairness dan Care / Harm is important to me, Fairness lebih tinggi dari rata rata orang liberal dan konservatif di Amerika, berikut ini penjelasannya:

The scale you completed was the “Moral Foundations Questionnaire,” developed by Jesse Graham and Jonathan Haidt at the University of Virginia.

The scale is a measure of your reliance on and endorsement of five psychological foundations of morality that seem to be found across cultures. Each of the two parts of the scale contained three questions related to each foundation: 1) harm/care, 2) fairness/reciprocity (including issues of rights), 3) ingroup/loyalty, 4) authority/respect, and 5) purity/sanctity.

The idea behind the scale is that human morality is the result of biological and cultural evolutionary processes that made human beings very sensitive to many different (and often competing) issues. Some of these issues are about treating other individuals well (the first two foundations – harm and fairness). Other issues are about how to be a good member of a group or supporter of social order and tradition (the last three foundations). Haidt and Graham have found that political liberals generally place a higher value on the first two foundations; they are very concerned about issues of harm and fairness (including issues of inequality and exploitation). Political conservatives care about harm and fairness too, but they generally score slightly lower on those scale items. The big difference between liberals and conservatives seems to be that conservatives score slightly higher on the ingroup/loyalty foundation, and much higher on the authority/respect and purity/sanctity foundations.

This difference seems to explain many of the most contentious issues in the culture war. For example, liberals support legalizing gay marriage (to be fair and compassionate), whereas many conservatives are reluctant to change the nature of marriage and the family, basic building blocks of society. Conservatives are more likely to favor practices that increase order and respect (e.g., spanking, mandatory pledge of allegiance), whereas liberals often oppose these practices as being violent or coercive.

In the graph below, your scores on each foundation are shown in green (the 1st bar in each set of 3 bars). The scores of all liberals who have taken it on our site are shown in blue (the 2nd bar), and the scores of all conservatives are shown in red (3rd bar). Scores run from 0 (the lowest possible score, you completely reject that foundation) to 5 (the highest possible score, you very strongly endorse that foundation and build much of your morality on top of it).

Holding a bird… in golf and everything else in life

A friend of mine is an avid golfer… you know golf…  a silly game that people trying to put a ball into the hole and keep the stick outside… and he pay very expensive money to play… for me, Id rather play a game that we try to put the stick into the hole and keep the ball outside.. :)

Anyway, he taught me on how to play golf, and first thing he taught me is how to properly handle the stick (or club as he says it), “Hold it like you holding a bird” he said, “too loose the bird will fly, too tight the bird will die suffocated, either way you will say goodbye to the bird” and he continues on “yes we name our good score as birds… Birdie, Eagle and Albatross”.

Hold it like you holding a bird… an expression that stick in my mind… doesn’t it applies to almost everything else in life..? Say money… holding it too tight we will loose the enjoyment of using it and share it to make someone else happy… too loose and we will spend in unnecessary thing and spend more than we can…

Also applies in our love life, kids, spouse or friends… Holding it too tight, over jealousy, over protective only resulting of rejection, they will want their freedom back… no one wants to be kept captive, in a cage, as a property… but holding it too loose can be seen as ignorance, careless, we will loose them too… no one will love us back if we do not show to them our sincere love and care

This remind me of Golumn… you know the “Lord of The Ring” character that dedicated his life to get hold of the ring..? He refer the ring as “my precious”, exactly I can picture myself if I am trying to hold something to tight…

golumn

Jakarta… day one after Kelud mountain spew Ashes to cover most cities in Java